Anticipation

AHHH. Everything is finally over. I am finally 21, and I managed to go through my chalet without too much hiccups (Other than the issue with the banner) I still feel that the banner was really pretty, and it was a waste I did not manage to use it, not to mention the high opportunity cost. :( My GPA will probably commit suicide as a result. I just hope that the building it fell off from is a low-rise one and I would be able to undo the damage done when I get back to Singapore. But I have to be really grateful that I have such supportive friends especially Theresa and Josephine. <3 My other friends also helped to take pictures as well. As times like this, I really feel very blessed to have such wonderful friends. Thanks everyone. For coming and helping. <3

That aside, I have to say that I am wayyy too excited for my Swedish trip. I have never been away from home for so long and I think it will be a great learning journey for me. Especially in terms of money and time. While preparing for the trip, I realised how expensive can going on an exchange be.

REALLY EXPENSIVE.

So far, even before stepping out of Singapore, I have already spent S$3000 for the air ticket and other important documents such as residence permit and insurance. -__-||| I have to be really thankful that so far, I have gotten a lot of support(especially financial support) from my parents. I hope to be as frugal as possible during the trip and hope not to be too heavily in debt to my parents. D:

I AM STILL VERY EXCITED.

I am going to be away from home for the longest time I have ever been away from home. AHHH. Talk about independence. Luckily for me, I will be travelling with 12 other people from NTU to Linkoping so I will not be too lonely. ^^ So excited for the exchange especially because I have some of  my clique-mates going with me too. AHHH. Pleasepleaseplease let everything go on smoothly.

I have decided to create a separate blog to document my exchange so that my relatives will be able to see and experience being in Europe with me. I am going to miss my family quite a bit. I am sure.

Feeling really terrible.

Have you ever wondered why God always give us things in life that make us feel like crap?

The experience of planning for a birthday party seriously feel like crap. Why make any plans when they are doomed to fail anyway?! For the sake of the chalet, I painstakingly did up my banner on PS. I spent quite a lot of time on it only to be shot down every single time I let my mom see it. I did not like the pre-made ones she showed me either. We argued everytime we discuss the banner.

"The arch is not high enough."

"Cursive font looks better"

"Put more balloons."

"The colours do not stand out."

Of all the times I let her look at it, there was not one compliment. Not at all. Nada. On a normal day, I would probably let it slide and work on it better. But when I am having stress from exams, it becomes really taxing for me to not break down and cry at the stress.

Well, today was the last straw. It is a mistake to plan the chalet with just one day to do everything. Because the banner printing shop could not print my banner so we had to do it ourselves.There are so mini mistakes in the middle I do not even know where to start. 1) Wanting to have a banner in the first place, 2) Giving in to something I really do not like 3) Not giving in completely 4) Trying to get everyone's approval 5) Not being able to let go completely.

I just wanted to feel like I did something for the event instead of letting my mom do everything. I wanted it to have something of myself.

All I did was to make a fool out of myself and make everyone unhappy. This is really terrible. I do not like it.

I really do not know what is going to happen tomorrow and I am scared to sleep for the fear that my eyes remain puffy tomorrow. I hope that all will just magically become better. I need a fairy godmother ASAP. \